CT Scan

Justin has a CT scan scheduled for tomorrow (Monday). Pray that all goes well. It is to check the size of his thyroid. I'll post the results of this and his blood work, but it may be a month before we find out!

We had a great thunderstorm late this afternoon. There were beautiful cloud banks, fabulous lightning displays, and rain coming down so hard it looked like a blizzard. I love storms.

Another Doctor

Justin's Oncologist in Iowa City wants Justin to establish a relationship with a family practice doctor here in town, to handle the small things that come along. He also told us to have that doctor refer Justin to an endocrinologist for his thyroid. (This is because of Justin's insurance--it has to be started in our county and referred out). I chose a doctor that we met in the ER during the months that Justin was having seizures. She showed interest in Justin, which we liked. She is not taking new patients, but made an exception when we asked her--she was excited to have him.

Yesterday I went with Justin to his appointment. They did a comprehensive medical history, a mini physical, and set up a CT scan for next week. A nurse came in to take blood, and she got it on the first try! I was happy and told her she was amazing! Justin doesn't seem to mind much, but it drives me crazy when they have to poke him with needles over and over. I hate seeing my kid have to go through that, even if it is harder on me than him...

We will go back for results in a month. Evidently after that appointment, his doctor will send the results to an endocrinologist. Then we will set up an appointment to see him. She hinted that he would probably want to do surgery to take the thyroid out. But since Justin has cancer and that AVM in his brain, they may refer him back to Iowa City for the surgery. Round and round we go.

I have a feeling this is how it will be for all of us if we get national health care, and it is scary. We spend hours and hours chasing ourselves in circles. There is so much waste this way, double doctors, double time, double opinions, etc. It would be SO much easier if Justin's doc just referred him the the doctor of his choosing based on Justin's situation. Duh.

And that is my rant for the day. I feel better.

August Already!

It is amazing that August is here already. Life seems to go faster as I get older. I remember that just a few short years ago I was a single mom raising three kids, working two jobs, teaching two classes and having a great life. Now I can't seem to figure out how to do one job and nothing else.

My challenge to me is to get busier. I have decided that although I was too busy back then, I got a tremendous amount of work and play done. Now I am not busy at all and can't seem to accomplish anything. So I am going to begin a careful adjustment into some more activity.

Since Justin got sick, my life has been a whirlwind of other people's activities. I had to put my life on the shelf for more than a year. And I do not regret it at all. But now I am not needed as much and I feel a little lost. That is unusual for me.

I am looking at this big, wide world and I am not sure how to get back into life.

Driving Again!

Justin is driving again! After 18 months of not driving due to seizure activity, he is once again on the road. He has had NO seizure activity since February 1st, and he feels great! He took me out for ice cream tonight to celebrate. What a blessing and a relief to have him mobile again. Thank You, Lord.

Cheesecake FATory

So all of us July birthday people got a wonderful and huge gift from Josh and Hannah, a gift card to go out to eat together at the Cheesecake Factory. It is a yummy place to go and we were all excited to get to go not once, but twice. Sunday night was perfect, as we were actually all home at the same time.

The menu is a bound (spiral) book. It takes about an hour to read it, so you really want to have some idea of what you are hungry for before opening it. I decided before we got there that it was a chicken sort of night. Not sure why, just felt like eating chicken. Josh gave us a list of his favorites, but chicken was not on his list. The good thing was, only one page of chicken dishes. So I had an easy time selecting my dinner. I got Crusted Romano Chicken, which was deeeelicious. The chicken had been pounded flat, so it took up the whole plate. Did I say plate? I mean platter. It was served on a PLATTER. And topped with pasta, enough to feed our whole family and take leftovers home. The guys got the double barbeque bacon cheeseburger, and Tams got the Chipotle chicken fingers. Once again, on PLATTERS, with enough french fries to keep McDonalds going for an hour or so. It was an incredible amount of food.

Of course we tried to make a dent in our dinner, but it was just too much. It didn't even look like I had started on the pasta, and everyone had lots of leftovers. Some things go home well and some don't, so we ended up leaving quite a bit behind. We were too full to even imagine dessert, much less order it. Right there with the best cheesecake, and no desire for it...

So that got me thinking. Who gets to choose what a "portion" is going to be? Who decides that a plate isn't good enough but a platter will work better? And why aren't there menu selections for those of us who don't want to go home feeling like we just ate a cinder block? I didn't see a lighter menu, a senior menu, a diet menu or even a children's menu. You got a feast, whether you wanted it or not. Hmmm. I would like to know.

I was thrilled that we got to go out, and LOVED the food. But in a few weeks when we go again, I am going to look at the menu for something small! I think it will be a challenge.

A Great Sunday

Sundays are very special to me. I love to begin each week with a Sunday--it just seem to put my life back on track again.

First, I had to take Justin to work, but for the last time. He gets to drive again on Saturday, so he can get himself wherever he needs to go. What a blessing that it has been 6 months since he had any seizure activity! That is the BEST news!

I got to church just as it started. I love being there, singing, learning and fellowshipping with my friends.

After church, I always pick up something for lunch and go to the lake that is halfway between church and my home. I always drive across the dam, watch the boats for a while, then drive around below the dam to see what is going on in the park. Then back across the dam and down the river a little to a park along the water. There are huge trees there that are beautiful to see, hear, and sit in their shade. As long as it is not raining, I will sit along the river for a few hours and just watch. (I even go in the winter, though I stay in the car!) I watch for birds, animals, fish jumping, boats, jet skis, fishermen, picnics, motorcycles, and anything else that I can see. I don't say a word all that time...just sit and think, and watch, and listen. It is a beautiful time each week to just be me. I miss it if I cannot be there.

The most important part of being along the water is contemplation. This world is so fast, furious, and noisy! It is so great to spend some quiet hours every week, thinking about life, praying, reading, watching, listening. I enter the new week calm and relaxed, and at peace.

Birthday Month

In our family, we have 8 birthdays in July. Since there are so many, we have a tendency to put them all together and just celebrate once. And so we did, on July 4th when the whole family was here anyway. We had parade candy by the bowlful, all the food you would care to eat, snacks and beverages all day long, and even red, white and blue bomb pops to have during our fabulous front yard, front row seats to terrific fireworks. After the fireworks ended, we came in to allow the traffic to thin. We sang and had birthday cake. A rather special cake.

It was a milestone birthday for me this time, and I really didn't feel like making a big deal out of it. My kids kept asking me what I wanted to do, so I finally just said I would make a birthday cake to have for the 4th...and maybe we could eat out later or something.

I had a craving for German Chocolate cake. I haven't had one for a long time and decided to try it. Right after my decision, I was watching TV and Bobby Flay had a "throw down" with the best German chocolate baker on the east coast. I watched as they each baked their best, then put them to the test with the judges. Bobby's won--no surprise there--but one of the judges had taken a bite out of the "loser" cake and declared, "this is my mother's cake!" She was impressed. I went on Bobby's website and printed off the recipe for the winner.

I made a list of what I would need to make the winning cake. I could not believe the ingredient list! There were 2 kinds of sugar--a brand name I have never heard of. The recipe included goat's milk, coconut milk, a vanilla bean that you must scrape out the seeds to use, a coconut liquor of some type, special flour, special leavening, special butter, special chocolates, special pecans, special everything. It would have cost me $100 to make!

So I decided to make the "loser" cake instead. Imagine my delight when the recipe called for flour, sugar, eggs, butter, German chocolate, and other things I had already!

When I was a young bride, I thought I was a decent cook. I tried to make a layer cake out of a boxed mix. It was a disaster I never forgot. I could not get it right. It broke apart, crumbled, and generally didn't do what a cake should do. It didn't even look like a pretty good try. It looked like someone had dropped it and picked it up in pieces. And that was my best work! I did not try another layer cake again from sincere humiliation....until now....
Ta Da! My birthday cake was fun to make, beautiful to look at, and very, very delicious. I'm glad I decided to give myself a birthday present of a second chance! So happy birthday Justin, Dad, Dave, Erik, Jason, Mia, and Jaxon...and me!